Homily for the Second Sunday in Ordinary Time (Year C - 1/19/2025)

Today’s Gospel is the wedding at Cana or, as I like to think of it, the Second Luminous Mystery of the Holy Rosary. In the Gospel account of the wedding at Cana, we learn two valuable lessons. The first lesson is, we need to invite Jesus and Mary (and even the disciples) to be part of our marriage and family life. The second lesson is from the Blessed Virgin Mary who gives us the best advice any mother can give us when she tells us to “Do whatever [Jesus] tells you.”

A few weeks ago, we gathered together as a family to celebrate my parents’ 50th anniversary. In my toast, I congratulated them on 50 years of marriage. I thanked them for the sacrifices they made in raising three boys and for loving us and our wives, as well as their grandchildren. I begged their forgiveness for the times that we did not show them the love and respect that they deserved. I assured them that it was because we lacked the proper words in Vietnamese to express our deepest desires for them - that they enjoy their retirement and trust that they have raised us to be men who can take care of our families.

I have been reflecting on my parents' marriage a lot. Theirs is a marriage that is built on a foundation of mutual love and respect for one another. Theirs is a marital bond that was forged in the crucible of raising a family in a foreign land when they immigrated to the U.S. from Vietnam. Theirs is a marriage that continues to withstand the test of time as they transition from one chapter to the next in their storied life together as husband and wife. I also reflected on my own marriage to my wife, Theresa, because the qualities that I just described - love and respect, courage and strength, and patience - are all things I desire for our own marriage. It also got me wondering what the difference is between my parents’ marriage and our sacramental marriage.

During my preparation, I came across this profound explanation of natural and sacramental marriage in a commentary by Fr. Paul J. Keller (9/27/2013) who wrote that the “difference between natural and sacramental marriage is not a degree of holiness, but the end (as in goal) of each kind of marriage. Natural marriage has natural ends, goals which are for the good of life on earth. Sacramental marriage, however, includes all the ends of natural marriage and, in addition, has the purpose of the spouses helping each other (and their children) to attain heaven through the special sacramental graces that come from belonging to Christ and being married in Him. . . sacramental marriage is a matter of nothing less than full, human flourishing both on earth and everlasting life in heaven.”

There is truth to this. You see, in their own way, my parents strive to live a life of holiness in the same way that my wife and I strive for holiness. However, while my wife and I are also trying to help each other prepare for eternal life in heaven, for my parents, this life on earth, this is it for them. I once believed as my parents still do. You see, after an 8-year courtship, Theresa and I knew that we loved each other so, naturally, the next step was for us to get married. I knew we had to get married in the Catholic Church because there is this rule that says “if [couples] want to live in harmony, they should adhere to the principles of the person following the more difficult rules. If you love someone, then you respect their values and rules, and you help them follow them” (Pawłowicz, 06/09/17). In our case, it was Theresa because she was the devout Catholic in our relationship while I was barely a practical Buddhist.

Even as we were going through marriage preparation, here at St. Albert the Great Catholic Church, I was content with being married to Theresa “til death do us part.” That is, until our sponsor couple got me thinking about everlasting life in heaven, if not for myself, then for Theresa who I love. [mindblown] That changed the trajectory of my life because, from that moment on, I realized that I needed to do my part not only to help Theresa get to heaven but to help her get me to heaven. In other words, why should we settle for a natural marriage when our marriage could be elevated to a Sacrament, as God intended marriage to be between one man and one woman with Chrrist at the center? And so, even though, I was not Catholic on our wedding day, I desired to have a Catholic Mass, to have our Eucharistic Lord present in our ceremony because, like the bride and groom at the wedding in Cana, Theresa and I wanted to invite Jesus and Mother Mary to be part of our life together from day one of our marriage.

When Pope Saint John Paul II gave us the Luminous Mysteries of the Holy Rosary, he wrote this about the Second Mystery - Jesus’ self-manifestation at the wedding of Cana: “the Gospel clearly shows the power of Mary's intercession as she makes known to Jesus the needs of others” (Rosarium Virginis Mariae, 10/16/2002). For Theresa and I, we wanted Mother Mary to watch over us, protect us, and intercede on our behalf to her Son like she did for the bride and groom, in today’s Gospel, when she shielded them from the embarrassment of running out of wine on their wedding day. We wanted the Blessed Mother to remind us to do whatever Jesus tells us every time we stray from the path that Christ has set before us. We wanted Jesus to be at the center of our marriage and family life because only Christ can replenish and renew the “good wine” of our conjugal love so that it never runs dry.

A Sacramental Marriage is what the Church desires for married couples because it is what Jesus desires. My marriage to Theresa became a sacramental marriage when I came home to Rome at the Easter Vigil. For couples who are not married in the Church, Saint Albert the Great wants to journey with you and bring you all into full communion with the Church. Deacon Edward Rositas can help you with the marriage process. Deacon David Ochoa can help if you need the Sacraments of Initiation. I teach the CALLED TO BE ONE Marriage Class and would love to have you in class as we explore God’s plan for your marriage. For couples who are going through the annulment process, I urge you to be patient and trust the process, and to use this time to grow in your relationship with God and each other through prayer.

Jesus elevated marriage between one man and one woman to a Sacrament to be the visible, outward sign of his love for his Bride, the Church. In the mystery of the Incarnation, our Lord took on our humanity and united it with his divinity so that we might have life and have it abundantly (John 10:10), not only in this life but in eternal life in heaven with him. Let us not short-change ourselves and our spouse, whom we love, by limiting what Jesus has to offer us in the Sacrament of Holy Matrimony. I want to conclude with this wisdom from Bishop Robert Barron, who said: "Given our imperfections and weaknesses, married life can be tough work. Marriage can be even tougher when it is lived apart from God. . . If we invite Jesus into our marriages and family life and ask him to enable us to live out our commitments in faithfulness and love, he will transform the water of ordinary married life into the wine of sanctification. God's grace will permeate the joys and difficulties of our marriages, and they will be the means by which spouses grow together in holiness, bearing fruits in our families.