Last week, I met with a young man who came to me about two years ago after he did something that almost cost him his marriage. His wife did not give up on him or their marriage; however, she also did not allow herself to be “passive” in her response to his actions. Rather, she supported him as he sought professional help and held him accountable, which he needed. At the end of our meeting, he said that “marriage is hard.” I told him that I completely agreed with him. Love, as our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ teaches us, is an act of the will. I told him that a husband and his wife wake up every morning and renew the vows that they made with each other on their wedding day, to will the good of each other for the sake of their marital bond and their families.
I share this experience because, in today’s Gospel, Jesus “forbids even [the] proportionate retaliation” that was allowed in the Old Testament laws found in the Books of Numbers and Leviticus, such as “An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth.” In the marital relationship, this is akin to husband and wife “keeping score” - you did this so I get to do this. However, marital love is as Saint Paul wrote (1 Corinthians 13:4-8): “Love is patient, love is kind. It is not jealous, [love] is not pompous, it is not inflated, it is not rude, it does not seek its own interests, it is not quick-tempered, it does not brood over injury, it does not rejoice over wrongdoing but rejoices with the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails.”
Moreover, in marriage, husband and wife are called to go the extra mile out of love for one another. This is similar to what Jesus teaches us, saying: “Should anyone press you into service for one mile, go with him for two miles.” Additionally, in marriage, husband and wife are called to give 100% of each other and, when one of them can only give 99% or less, then the other is called to go that extra mile to make up the difference. It is as Jesus teaches us, saying: “Give to the one who asks of you, and do not turn your back on one who wants to borrow." Going back to the story of the young man that I met with last week, his wife did not turn her back on him after what he did. Rather, she went the extra mile to help him become the man and husband God intended him to be, for her, for him, for their marriage.
My sisters and brothers in Christ, as you might have discerned from what I have shared, marriage and family life help us to live out these teachings of Jesus with those who we love. We learn not to keep score. We learn to go the extra mile. We learn that we do not turn our backs on those we love. From these lessons learned in marriage and family life, we can then learn to do the same for our neighbors who we might not have as intimate a relationship with, such as our friends, our co-workers, or even strangers we encounter in our daily lives.
No comments:
Post a Comment